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Real Love And Actual Relationship Goals

            I'm a sucker for Love. Hopeless romantic if you like. I grew up with movies like High school Musical and I had learned all the love songs word by word😎. I'd pretend I was waltz dancing with my imaginary Troy Bolton(imaginary white boyfriend in the picture above😂) and all our friends (in this case sofas, wall unit and the television😕) were so jealous of me because they didn't have my kind of Love like in the movie(Judge me softly. Whatever that means😃). We had this sukumawiki farm that mom had neatly planted outside our house and I'd get my hair brush and sing to the plants and tell them all about love. Yes, I wanted to be Hannah Montana (minus the wigs😉) and have a really cute boyfriend with Justin Beiber's original haircut😝😆(Don't throw stones.13 year me loved Beiber and his hair). My first soap opera was La Mujer De Mi Vida and there's a day I literally cried my eyes out and refused to eat because my parents refused that I should watch a soap opera before bed😢 because I didn't get my daily dose of love😂. If you scroll down my facebook timeline(Don't. You won't succeed. The Lord has since saved me😝) to the first time I posted, you'll see the first person I directly messaged on the timeline was Jose Miguel Montesinos from the soap opera Soy tu duena🙈🙉 (I talk too much😞)

       How old was I again? Not old enough. My view of love was shaped very early by the media. Faces, a good body and smooth talk was my idea of love from the gazillion soap operas and romantic movies I watched😐. I had to learn that A bunch of genetically blessed people acting on a production budget cannot and do not define love in a period of sixty minutes to ninety minutes quoting what someone else wrote. Real life whopped my butt big time teaching me that lesson😥. I felt so cheated when I saw the behind scenes of Titanic considering that I had cried my eyes out for three straight days because of how Jack loved Rose!😭😭 Oh I googled and the story was fiction😒. Darn! what a twisted reality.

          I'm no expert in love matters(Clearly😃) but I know a little sumn' sumn'😎 Let's go to social media love. I love social media because it presents the greatest opportunity to spread the message of The Lord to a very large number of people. BUT It's also where everyone is trying so hard to prove to the world that their lives are perfect😝. Folks feed us with their relationship details on social media like their perfect couple pictures and you'll see friends and strangers alike comment ''Aaaaw relationship goals😍'' ''I want your kind of love💕'' ''Goals for days💖'' ''You two are so perfect for each other💑'' 
         I have also seen unmarried couples who are perfect on social media but miserable in real life😳. They physically fight, hurt each other and sometimes it looks like are about to kill each other. But when it's time for perfect lighting, camera and action it becomes hashtag my main man, #too blessed to be stressed, #ride or die, #le boyfie, #your relationship goals, #haters go hang yourselves, #she's mine find yours, #my girl badder than yours, #Bae watch, #you can't touch this....blah blah blah and the final blah😒. Honestly, I don't mind. I love seeing people in love😍. Goodness gracious I do (You don't want to know how watching weddings make me cry and how many wedding videos I've watched🙈🙊) I however prefer to see married couples in love on social media. It makes more sense that way. The thing is, we have people who fall in love like five times a year and post all the fives baes and before the audience gets over the previous one there's already another one and I'm there scrolling like..."Another boy/girl friend. Bruh😫 Already??Gerrarahia mehn!😒" (This is the part I'd sip Slimming Tea as I smirk at that story but I have none so moving on swiftly😂)

          One day I was going about my business as usual on the streets of twitter when I remembered I used to see a certain famous twitter relationship so I put on my stalker coat😎 and as a concerned shareholder I landed on their timelines(How else will I put to use all the knowledge I gather from series like stalker and The Mentalist?🙈) Boy! Folk broke up and my oh my wamae!(Jeff Koinange voice😜) it was nasty. They hurled insults at each other, made memes to mock each other's weakness, started trending hashtags and their little secrets saw the light of day (I know I should have brought popcorn for this grand finale...caramel popcorn to be precise...for anyone feeling blessed to take me to the movies😂). It was like they never even liked each other let alone love. In a week after the break up, folk had moved on with other people and posting pictures with hashtag new beginnings just like that😨. Bruuuh!Just like that😲😵The funny thing is that there were still people out there investing their precious emojis(don't waste emojis. Emoji lives matter😎) to comment on the new found bae pictures. Clearly all that social media hype is just hype! 🙍

John 3:16 For God loved the world so much that he gave his only son so that everyone who believes in Him may not die but have eternal life.
This is probably the most common bible verse in all of history. The thing about common verses is that they are so repeatedly said but hardly understood. This has everything to do with relationships if you're wondering. God sacrificed the very thing He loved most. For what? A bunch of humans He loved but didn't love Him back. His heart spoke of love, His mind had a plan to save the world, His will was that the world He was planning to save would believe in His son and His reward was forever with Him. What does this mean? God's plan revolved and was centered on Jesus Christ. From the beginning, Jesus was the center. 
Ephesians 1:10 God's plan is to bring all creation together with Christ as Head.
                                   John 1: 3a Through Him God made all things.
           Honey, you cannot begin to love another person wholly if you don't love Jesus. Everything exists to be centered in Christ Including relationships.  That's how God rolls. It just won't work without Jesus. Let's retrace our steps back to the cross and focus on Jesus for a moment(this story gets me all the time😭😭)...the Romans used a whip made of small pieces of bones and metal attached to a number of leather strands and 39 times that thing fell on Jesus' bare back, they made a crown of thorns set it on His head and then struck Him on the head with a rod over and over, spat on Him, mocked Him. As if that wasn't enough, He still had a cross to carry. On Calvary, Nails about 7 inches long were driven through His palms and feet and raised on the wooden cross like a low life Criminal and left to die. FOR WHAT I ASK? BECAUSE OF LOVE! FOR GOD LOVED YOU AND I SO MUCH! Beloved, they shouted  ''Kill Him! Give us Barrabas!''...They chose Barrabas after everything He had done for them But He still chose them after everything they had done to Him! He chose us, He chose the cross and did not stop them when they insulted Him(Isaiah 50:6) How then can we not center this kind of Love in our relationships?

          Unless you take time and soak in all that sacrifice that was made for you, a person undeserving of love, then you will not be in a position to love another person as flawed as you. Love is not a bunch of feelings wrapped up in sweet words, it's not some expensive designer gifts, it's not some perfectly edited pictures, it's not a date or a candle lit dinner. There are so many definitions of Love but here is mine. JESUS IS LOVE AND LOVE IS JESUS. He is the equation and the equation is Him. The problem with the world is that it tries to separate the equation so that it can accommodate a pair of thighs in its bed and justify it using feelings, it wants to touch but touch just a little as long as it doesn't get to third base or home run because after all home run is 'the real sin'😒...We equate and justify Love with what we see others in the world doing when they're in love. How about we look to Jesus and see what He did when He proved His Love for us then emulate it? The secret here is to FOCUS ON JESUS. When you do that, you start to see your his plan for love through His eyes and even more beautiful is you start to see sin through his eyes and flee from it.
           Some wonder why their relationships don't last whereas ''God told them H/She was the one.'' Does God tell you that h/she is the one and then goes ahead and breaks y'all relationship?😝The truth is it just felt right, the squad will applaud us because of how hot the partner is, our hormones approved of the relationship then we tried to fix God somewhere in there so that He can approve and honey that is bound to fail sooner or later! it's a serious sumn' sumn' we call lust. If it's from Him then it has to start from Him and In Him and end with Him in eternity. It's not for show, it's not for appearances and it's not for some app. It's for the lord because after all every good and perfect gift comes from above(James 1:17)

             No, it's not a pair of matching louboutins or yeezys, not matching clothes written His and Hers, not even matching cars or matching pair of designer watches. All these things are cute and fancy and I like them but they won't buy you and your partner eternity so they should not be the focus. The internet presents these pictures of people who seem to have really mastered the art of life and relationships. The idolisation of perfect couple pictures seems to paint the essence and destination of life as getting yourself a man or woman that's insanely attractive and who will make cute pictures for the gram😒. Everyone trying to be so extra in order to qualify as other people's goals. And this breeds the ground for comparison. Comparison makes one crave for what they see even if they don't understand the story behind it. For someone like that, love then becomes how well she and the bae can look more like with Kim And Kanye, Beyonce and Jayz....etc etc. And that for them becomes goals. A shadow of other people's love.

                       Do you desire love so that you can be complete? Do you desire love so that you can boast to your friends about it and post pictures on social media? Do you desire love so that y'all can wear matching things and get cute babies? Do you desire love so that you can finally walk down the aisle with that cute Cinderella dress? Do you desire love because you're Getting old? Do you desire love because all your mates seem to have found it? WHAT IS YOUR GOAL FOR FINDING LOVE? Is it that God should be glorified in your relationship or that you May be glorified by others for it? When you understand the purpose of something then you won't abuse it...Even Love. You know why it's easy for someone to be a player? Because they see a jar of hearts they can collect and place on the shelf BUT they don't see hearts that were bled for on a cross and how precious every heart is because it was bought by blood. They don't see the purpose of Love.

          Eternity is my goal. Forever with Jesus is my dream. My goal is to stand before the King of Kings and hear, ''Well done Good and Faithful servant.'' I want to know that I'll eventually stand before Majesty and My best friend surrounded by glory wondering whether I will dance for Him or in awe of Him be still. And if My earthly relationship does not reflect Jesus who is love then I don't want it. That's why I can't afford to make what I see on instagram as real life goals. I don't want the glitterati and grandeur that many are dying for and miss out on the real authentic reward of John 3:16. If it does not look to Him as the example of Love, I simply don't want it

           I'm no love guru but Looking for love, making some earthly goals and then fixing Jesus in the picture will give you temporary satisfaction and a broken heart. Don't get me wrong, You might find love that way but it will only go as far as your eyes can see because after all the devil has counterfeit 'gifts' too. Jesus, Jesus And More Jesus. Just that name. Focus on that name and let it be your goal to find the kind of love that will be a reflection of Jesus. One that stirs in you a fire to fix your eyes on things above and not earthly things(Colossians 3:2). After all we're all but vacationers in this world because our real home is in heaven (John 14:2) and I don't know about you but As for me, I wanna have a blast seeking the Love and will of Jesus with someone as equally Crazy for the Lord. That means obeying, trusting and waiting on Him no matter what it costs. Jesus died for me and I will Live for Him. I Love you for being here💝. Annnnd hunney, listen to this song 🙆😉You covered me by Dr. Vernon
1 Thessalonians 4:17 Then we who are still alive and remain on earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And So we will be with the Lord forever.
Love and Love And Love. If you ever need someone to talk to email me .Jesus loves you like crazy.
Be bold. Be Dauntless. Be You.


  1. Wonderful piece. God bless you Shallie

  2. shallom...God bless yu for that...1st john 4:8...God is love....that was so powerful...listen to age to age by hillsong united...

    1. I am definitely downloading that. Hillsong is everything wonderful. Thank you Freddy. You're a big blessing.

  3. I really love this, you have opened my eyes to a beautiful reality... Could I repost this on my blog??

    1. Hey Alfie. I thank God for that. And you can repost and share with as many people as you want. Blessings❤

  4. Oh mayne, I can read the passion for CHRIST through each and every line of this post. I'm a faith based blogger as well and this post just touched my heart. More than that, it revived and renewed my understanding of this man who died on the cross for me and keeps on saving me from sin every single day. Thank you for accepting His call on your life to minister to others and may He increase and transform you more and more into His image that you may win more souls to His kingdom. In case I don't get to meet you on earth, see you in eternal life 😘

    1. Hey Katherine. Oh goodness😭😭😭 Thank you so much for the Love. And I'd love to read your blog too. Could you please give me the link? And Amen to telling others about Jesus and accepting the call. God bless you abundantly and I believe that we shall meet in this life and in the Next. Love And Love❤❤

    2. Oh yayy! My blog is . Love, love and more love to you my dear. I also happened to just inbox you on facebook but my email address is Hope to hear from you soon 😘

    3. Annnd We bless Jesus for New Flames ❤❤❤

  5. God in everything.
    I like this ultimatum and the humour at the beginning of course.Nice piece

    1. Thank you Agrippina. You have such a beautiful name. I could say it all the time. Blessings❤

  6. Never stop spreading Gods love dear😊👍

    1. By His Grace, I will continue to press on. Thank you for always reading darling ❤

  7. One word...AMEN!!!
    *Leans back and stares at the office wall smiling"

  8. Such a wonderful piece dearie..indeed you are a vessel of God to reach out to many.keep writing and I'll keep reading ur blog.You are so blessed

  9. This is brilliant...keep on keeping on.

  10. Hello, i am from USA, I want to share this great testimony about how Dr.Agbazara helped me bring back my ex lover, During my search for solution i came in contact with Dr.Agbazara details and through his help my lover came back to me within 48 hours. So with these i am so bold to advise anyone seeking for a way to get there lover back to contact Dr.Agbazara on WhatsApp: { +2348104102662 } or via email at: { } I am so happy at least myself and my lover are back to each other again and going to spend the New Year celebration together Thank to Dr.Agbazara once again....


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